Doped up on codeine and panadol I had my second scan today. Due to the ill effects of the last scan and the likelihood of slow growing eggs, I got to skip the usual monitoring scan on Saturday and go straight to today, Monday. Thankfully the doctor's estimates were right and a scan on Saturday would have been a lot of pain for no gain. As it was Wednesday's scan had me miserable until Saturday anyway. Today's was uncomfortable and unpleasant but, thanks to the pain relief on board, wasn't so brutal as the first. Things are certainly happening in my ovaries!
I now have 6 eggs on my right ovary maturing and 5 on my left. The perfect number I reckon. They are "borderline" in size apparently which means that they need to consult with the doctors and my blood test results to decide if egg collection will be on Wednesday or on Friday. I'm guessing they don't do Thursdays! Unfortunately they're not that teeny bit more ready as not only does the thought of paying for more Gonal F injections make my heart race, it also throws up the question of whether I need another Zolodex injection. It's a down to the day question. If Wednesday no, if Friday maybe. And I don't know what happens then because Zolodex lasts a month and implantation is supposed to take place 5 days after collection. So I'm not going to think about it and find out when I get a call this afternoon!
I did go to acupuncture on Friday as I was so sore still from the scan and my ovaries have the odd scream at me. Everything is uncomfortable. I honestly can't believe how much better it made me feel! I had needles sticking in my feet, legs, tummy, elbows and the top of my head (yep, seriously) and I lay, fairly unable to move, relaxing for over an hour. I walked out no longer feeling like I had been violated with a baseball bat and a lot calmer. I'm going to go back before egg collection and before and after implantation as I think I now actually believe it may be of some help. Before I was sceptical and anxious not to spend any more money than we are already having to. Surely we must win lotto soon!!!!!
The injection giving itself has been going well. They're pretty easy and almost painless to give and except for the nano second before they go in, I don't give them a seconds thought. They are turning me into a bit of a hormonal wreck on the rampage but then they also provide an excuse for me feeling crappy. I'm a little irrationally emotional and I want to cry at the tiniest of things. I'm like a baking egg souffle. I also want to kill my step daughter, but then maybe that's not an unusual state of affairs. I'm going to hibernate when the Rabbit is a teenager. And maybe the new maybe baby will be a boy? I don't like teenaged girls! It's even worse when they're not your own. It's where me and her mother have it back to front - she's all fault no responsibility. I get the poxy responsibility stage with no fault. I struggle to find a silver lining with the Contessa too. Maybe it will be grandchildren?
The Rabbit asked me yesterday morning if "I'd ever lain on Daddy or if Daddy had ever lain on me". I braced myself. I said that we had. I couldn't at the time be certain if she was talking about sex as she's usually A LOT more specific. She then asked me if I really loved Daddy. And I said I really, really did, which is why I married him. She got so excited and grinned from ear to ear. "That means I might get a baby sister or a baby brother and that is so exciting." she said. I wanted to say "talk to the petrie dish" but instead I said "maybe Darling, but remember Mummy has a very, very sick tummy so it might never happen." I let myself get a bit excited though!
So that's me: bloated, sore, moody, murderous (in respect to the teen) and excited, a bit. Scared a bit. EXHAUSTED and waiting for a phone call to let me know the plan! I'll let you know.
No comments:
Post a Comment