9 May 2012

9 Weeks and Praying

Today, I have to say, is hard, even though as time goes on with no cramps I guess all is well. So the good news is still that I am 9 weeks pregnant today. My midwife still says chances are everything is fine as my scan says so. But it is ever so hard to relax. I don't know if the bleeding has stopped as I refuse to look. I am acting like a blind person in the toilet. I figure if I can't stop what is happening, and it isn't getting worse, then I am better not to know about it! I'm hoping to have another scan tomorrow or Friday. I so desperately want this baby!

My Rabbit went back to school today. I dragged her there crying. She's always reluctant to return after a break and to make matters worse she spent a few hours with some tattoo pens yesterday and still has marked hands. She was terrified of being in trouble. It's a difficult position to be in, allowing schools to have rules but wanting to tell your child that if the teacher has a problem with a little bit of ink then she's a silly bitch. No, I didn't say that but I did promise to tell the teacher so that my five year old didn't have to. Or worse, get caught. Thankfully there was a relieving teacher who thought being in trouble for a few pink marks would be silly. I told her how upset the Rabbit was about the thought of being in trouble and I threatened to bash her if she picked on my kid. No I didn't. But I wanted to. She was terribly nice and said she'd make sure she knew it was ok and she'd look after her for me. I felt bad for wanting to bash her.

I've just been back down to the school to drop in some sushi for lunch. The Rabbit seemed as happy as larry. No doubt she'll spend part of the day drawing on her hands with felt and being a mischief but I felt a lot better knowing she was happy. That's twice I've left the house now since Monday night. I've been reluctant to move in case the baby falls out. We had nothing to make sandwiches out of for lunches, hence the sushi, and my carpet is screaming 'vaccuum me'. But I'm still thinking I don't want to do too much. Or move. Or find anything stressful. So I'm going to force some lunch down me and curl up on the couch with my book!





1 comment:

  1. I have 2 wishes- one that you'll do what you said you would and read on the couch.. for ages.. and 2 that I never have to relief teach for C's class lol

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